How much better is silence; the coffee cup, the table. How much better to sit by myself like the solitary sea-bird that opens its wings on the stake. Let me sit here for ever with bare things, this coffee cup, this knife, this fork, things in themselves, myself being myself.
Virginia Woolf, The Waves
Sophie has Covid, and the two of us are alone together for the duration. After she tested positive and I panicked in my mind, recovered and got intentional, entertained the tap dancers of anxiety for a few hours and then watched them disappear down the hallway and out the front door, the house settled into us, snug quiet.
Sophie is resting, sleeping a lot. She has a good amount of congestion and had a low fever, but she is eating and drinking. She has had no seizures which is interesting when I want to think about what is interesting in her seizure life. She had no seizures for a couple of weeks after her Covid vaccinations, and whenever she has fever, her seizures disappear as well. I’ve mentioned this to countless doctors, but no one has ever taken interest in my tiny little mother mind™ observation, so I’ll tell you, dear Reader. I also added CBDV* to her cannabis medicine protocol a few months ago, and it’s cut her seizure activity by about 95%. This, too, is something that my tiny little mother mind™ knows is considered anecdotal evidence by The Powers That Be and thus relegated to a slot in an industrial-sized neurological mortuary. I think, ruefully, I don’t care, anymore even as I am grateful grateful grateful for the grace offered.
Just so you know, I have no symptoms of The Virus, have tested negative and am resigned to getting it myself (at last) but wear a mask and wash my hands as often as I can. To those who say it’s just like the flu or even it’s just a cold, I remind you of the over one million dead in our country and the countless caregivers, particularly of the disabled, whose lives are held suspended in snug houses while the rest of the world goes blithely on.
*I’m happy to talk to you about CBDV if you want to email me or leave a question in the comments. The product I use is from Rare Cannabinoid Company in Hawaii. We started with a small amount and are now up to 2 ml, twice a day. It’s expensive, but I believe a 95% reduction in grand mal seizures is worth it. If it’s a honeymoon (for the uninitiated, a honeymoon in SeizureLand is a short period of time when a drug or treatment works before the monsters return), we are very much enjoying Fiji and hope to live here permanently. I have no doubt that the cannabis cocktail offers her protection from a myriad of things, as evidence of its anti-microbial, anti-viral, anti-inflammatory and other antis mounts. But, I’m Not a Doctor, thank god, so please don’t take what I say as Medical Advice.
I'm so sorry that Sophie has covid. I guess (sigh...) it is inevitable that we will all get it. I have no idea why I haven't. I hope that her bout with it is short and relatively easy, yours too if you get it.
Why HASN'T any doctor been curious about the Sophie's decrease in seizures when she's sick or after vaccinations? I can't imagine not being interested in finding out the roots of that. Have you done any research on your own, like just on the internet to see if others report the same?
In your spare time, perhaps? HahahahHA!
Kisses and hugs from across the country via the web are completely safe, I hear. I send many to you and Soph.
I wish I could bring you soup and also I will take the advice of your *tiny mother mind* over any number of professionals. Nothing against the profession, it just seems to be that its abilities and imaginations stop at a certain point. But people coping with medical problems don't have that luxury. Much love and health to you both!