13 Comments

I would have reacted the same way, Elizabeth. I do act the same way and jump down the throats of people who think they are sharing something innocent with me but trips all the racist alarms that I (feel like I) see everywhere all the time. And then I feel like an ass. It's hard. No matter how you look at it, though, that woman was wrong and deserved your irritation. It's not up to you to react saintly in immediate response to such an awful, unexpected, unsolicited interaction.

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The desire to swing a giant ax at this woman feels totally justified to me.

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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Elizabeth Aquino

I get this on some level. It’s not on you to educate others or indulge their rudeness or ignorance. I think if that woman had been paying attention she could have learned something valuable from your response, but we humans can be so stupid and shallow and oblivious and unkind and I’m sorry such a one crossed your path today. I love the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows. I always want to give it as a gift but don’t trust that people will understand where it coming from so I’m thrilled to think you thumb through it too, all those words and their descriptions. It’s a kind of poetry to me. I’m glad you talked to your friend, who could touch the exact nature of today’s obscure sorrow, and lighten the weight of it. Love.

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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Elizabeth Aquino

sigh. Gorgeous photo, tell Carl.

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The osteopath seems to be wonderfully aware professional. I am sorry you encountered and were somewhat cornered by an oblivious fool. I hope you can find peace in focusing on the wonderful nature of the osteopath.

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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Elizabeth Aquino

You're doing a heckuva job educating me. So glad you've got a partner who helps offset the ignorance out there. Sorry you have to endure the stupidity and unwitting callousness that comes your way. You rock.

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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Elizabeth Aquino

Well I can certainly understand why you showed your displeasure. Good grief. What's wrong with people? (I ask ironically.)

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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Elizabeth Aquino

I know a woman who would perhaps act like that. She has no filters, no boundaries when it comes to her opinions, judgements, questions. And thinking about it now, she was in a terrible bike accident once but I think she was like that before. It is very difficult to know how to react around such people. Are they really being rude or is their natural way just what we perceive as rude? What's the difference? Rude is rude. You do not have to respond to it. You just DON'T. And quite frankly, when it's happened approximately 2,349,233 times, it is quite appropriate for you to feel anger, resentment, and deep exhaustion.

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I think I like your friend. And also your anger is totally justified. None of us are saints and we shouldn’t have to be.

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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Elizabeth Aquino

It sounds like that woman had some kind of a brain injury. I have a sister with a brain injury and she is chronically inappropriate, no filters and frontal lobe dysfunction.

Usually adults don't ask me what's wrong with Katie, it's children. I always tell them that there's something wrong with her brain. What I should say is that it's because she didn't eat her veggies (just thought of that now, a kind of PSA as it were).

I'm sorry she upset you. I tend to wear a fuck off face which stops people from asking. Maybe instead of smiling, put on a fuck off face:) I can teach you, I'm an expert at it now.

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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Elizabeth Aquino

What is WRONG with some people? Hey, I'd be pissed if I were In your position. What an odd encounter. I can't imagine shouting at someone like this...it's none of my damn business. How about a warm "Hello" instead?

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Oooh, that is a stunner.

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